I have decided to start writing about my anxiety disorders and how they affect my life. I don't know yet what this will look like. I might just start out with random thoughts.
I had to leave work early yet again today because the overwhelming panic was pressing down on me. It almost propelled me out of the office without much conscious effort on my part, it seemed. I did have enough presence of mind to send my supervisor a text. She was in a meeting and I didn't want to disturb her.
Normally I would worry that this latest episode would put my job in jeopardy. Not to worry...I've been told my job is being eliminated and my last day is June 30th. This only adds to the extreme anxiety I have on a regular basis.
I am on three types of medication, and I see a therapist as well. I have struggled for years with this (from early childhood, really), and a plethora of drugs have been marginally successful at best.
I really don't know what I'm going to do about the loss of my job. I've been applying to everything I can find, but the economy is still really bad here.